A Few Questions and (possibly) A Few Answers

Q: Are you for real? A: Indeed. I am 100% real.

Q: What do you really do? A: Sell space travel supplies.

Q: Oh come on. That's ridiculous. A: That wasn't a question.

Q: Fine...aren't you part a secret organization or something? A: You must be referring to 826 Seattle

Monday, December 19, 2011

How to avert a holiday crisis

With the holidays imminently close, does your face flush and do your hands get clammy when you have no idea what gift to get for folks on your gift list? Hopefully this only happens in this specific instance, otherwise I suggest seeking medical attention. Allow me to impart to you some highly prized gift suggestions for those “never know what to get them” people on your list.

The Self-Assigned Navigator who never asks directions but never gets lost: Been There, Done That set -- a Map of the Known Universe and a set of Solar System cards to send home with tales of rollicking adventure.

The Closeted Astronaut who has yet to admit that space travel is the most awesomest thing ever: Will I Make a Good Space Traveller? poster -- the answer is, “Of Course”, but it doesn’t hurt to be reassured of how stellar you are.

The Chief Engineer-In-Training who would just as soon build their own holiday gifts: the Little Helper -- because who couldn't use an extra set of alligator clips and a magnifying glass?  Think about it.

The Star of the Show who never gets a break because everyone wants to talk to them: Cherry-Scented Diversion Deployment System -- sometimes a good defense begins with a pleasant smelling distraction.

The Onboard Computer who argues wikipedia is not a primary source: Comparative Measuring Device -- because truth is relative until it isn’t.

The Celestial Dreamer who has tons of great ideas but can never remember them: Metallic Brain Stimulator -- also good for those who have no intention of feeling like they are in over their heads.

The Star Gazer who looks to the skies and sees themselves exploring the far reaches of the galazy: “Sic Itur Ad Astra” t-shirt -- where “Thus, one will go to the stars” is more a life mission than mere words.

Last but not least, the person who has everything: Certainty -- conveniently contained and ready for use should answers be questioned or the future be predicted.

Of course, you are free to decide which gift is right for the crew of your starship and the Greenwood Space Travel Supply Co. has a great deal more than what I’ve included here. You can also fly by the store and see what you can only obtain once you’re AFK ("away from keyboard", but you already knew that) like terrra forming supplies and games and activities that will help you while away the time in between exploring and discovering. Tell ‘em the captain sent you.

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