I still can’t believe it. What utter nonsense! Who’s in charge? Pluto is still not classified as a planet in our solar system? Surely, someone would have realized this atrocious mistake years ago and brought Pluto back into the planetary pantheon. No one? Why not?
That’s it! Pluto deserves better. I'm not going to let the International Astronomical Union cast off Pluto like so much stellar radiation unleashed to the edges of the universe. Pluto is awesome whether it’s called a planet or not. Pluto, I sing for thee!
In fact, the Greenwood Space Travel Supply Co. is having a Pluto Day march and rally to whip the citizens of Earth into a dwarf-planet-friendly frenzy! Join the celebration and show the galaxy that even though Pluto is small, it’s a big deal!
When: Saturday, March 10 at 12pm
What: 12pm sign making workshop / 1pm march / 1:15pm rally
Where: start at Greenwood Space Travel Supply Co. (8414 Greenwood Ave N) / rally at Neptune Coffee (8415 Greenwood Ave N)
Who: YOU!
The festivities begin with a sign making workshop at 12pm. Bring your wit, your cleverness, and your love for Pluto because slogans on signs are the best way to proclaim Pluto! If you have signs, bring them! The times may be different but the message remains the same. Sometimes, signs alone are not enough to effectively convey how much Pluto means to me so I have to get a little more creative, more in-your-face. Do you have a costume that perfectly captures Pluto’s grace and mystery? Wear it! Prizes will be awarded to the best signs and the best costumes.
The march hits the streets at 1pm followed by a rally at Neptune Coffee at 1:15pm. I will not be able to attend as I’m just beyond Saturn on my way to a hot air balloon festival on Jupiter. In my stead, there will be astronomy and Pluto experts at the rally to answer questions and astound you with facts about Pluto and our solar system. Walk, talk, chant, and chortle with us as we declare to the galaxy “Pluto belongs!”
Thursday, February 16, 2012
Monday, February 13, 2012
A Captain's Job
One of the most important duties of a captain on an interstellar voyage is keeping track of the time. Scoff if you think that's funny but with time being relative, it is imperative to be acutely aware of your frame of reference or you'll end up older than your dear aunt Sally and how awkward would that be? I'll tell you. Really, really awkward.
Since I miss Earth an awful lot and was born there, I set my clock to Earth-time. Even though I'm not often home for birthdays and holidays, I still celebrate them with my robot assistant PAL. He consults our Lunar Calendar and decorates the ship accordingly. I never plan a party without him. Did you know that PAL's literally a dancing machine? His favorite move is the Twist.
The best way to keep all those parties straight is to write it down and not lose that tiny slip of cellulose that I swear was right on the navigation console. Good thing I don't lose my Space Pens as easily. No space traveler should ever find themselves without a reliable communication device. You never know when you'll have to sign autographs for future cosmonauts.
Holidays and parties don't happen everyday, however, because even though PAL is a dancing machine, he's not a party machine. I'm hoping he gets a party upgrade soon. Until then, we keep the crew sharp by running exercise drills and employing Mostly Harmless Training Devices. No one's getting hurt on my watch.
Yessiree. Lots to do as the captain. Keeping the time, filling the time, finding the time, and biding my time. It's a wonder how it all gets done but I have great time doing it. Phew! I think it's getting close to my favorite event: nap time... right after we swing by the Greenwood Space Travel Supply Co. to pick up more party supplies.
Speaking of parties, save the date for the PLUTO DAY march and rally!
Since I miss Earth an awful lot and was born there, I set my clock to Earth-time. Even though I'm not often home for birthdays and holidays, I still celebrate them with my robot assistant PAL. He consults our Lunar Calendar and decorates the ship accordingly. I never plan a party without him. Did you know that PAL's literally a dancing machine? His favorite move is the Twist.
The best way to keep all those parties straight is to write it down and not lose that tiny slip of cellulose that I swear was right on the navigation console. Good thing I don't lose my Space Pens as easily. No space traveler should ever find themselves without a reliable communication device. You never know when you'll have to sign autographs for future cosmonauts.
Holidays and parties don't happen everyday, however, because even though PAL is a dancing machine, he's not a party machine. I'm hoping he gets a party upgrade soon. Until then, we keep the crew sharp by running exercise drills and employing Mostly Harmless Training Devices. No one's getting hurt on my watch.
Yessiree. Lots to do as the captain. Keeping the time, filling the time, finding the time, and biding my time. It's a wonder how it all gets done but I have great time doing it. Phew! I think it's getting close to my favorite event: nap time... right after we swing by the Greenwood Space Travel Supply Co. to pick up more party supplies.
Speaking of parties, save the date for the PLUTO DAY march and rally!
- Saturday March 10th at 12pm
- Meet at the Greenwood Space Travel Supply Co. (8414 Greenwood Ave N)
- We'll make signs, chant for Pluto and the other dwarf planets, and rally at Neptune coffee
Wednesday, February 8, 2012
Lunar Calendars for 2012!
Hot off the presses! The new Lunar Calendar for 2012! What better way to track the passage of time than by the elegant waxing and waning of our own satellite?
- Follow your favorite phases from crescent to quarter to half!
- Know when you can bathe in the cool reflected light of the full moon!
- Plan on having all manner of uncommon events happen on the blue moon!
- Tired of the old moon? A new moon's on the way!
Monday, January 30, 2012
Making Time for Space
Seated comfortably in my quarters, I like to sit back in my overstuffed captain’s chair and give myself a moment to let my mind wander the vastness of the universe. As you sip your latte and glance around at your fellow humans staring too intensely into brightly lit screens (yes, that's what you look like too), consider your place in the galaxy. Heavy thoughts, I know, but not so heavy as to affect your gravitational field, so go ahead and ponder. PAL, my robot assistant chides me for taking overly long breaks from my captain's duties, but, dude, that vastness is pretty darn big. If I'm going to wrap my mind around the universe, it's going to take some time... lots and lots of time.
Ah, space. So much to discover and explore! To the next generation of intersteller travelers, look to the coming year as your time to become an adventurer, a scientist, and a dreamer with thoughts so enormous only an infinite universe can contain it all!
But don't keep it to yourself, soon-to-be-astronaut. Write it down! How else would anyone know of your wondrous feats of derring-do? Just ask PAL. His exact words to me were, "I don't want to hear it!" I understood immediately. Obviously, he thought my tales were too amazing for his audio receptors alone.
As Earth continues along a new revolution, we only need to look to the stars to see that our future is not as far off as we think. With a well supplied rocket ship equipped with food, water, oxygen, and tons of books and games, I think the adventures are about to begin. I look forward to it and hope you will join me. Don't forget to write.
Ah, space. So much to discover and explore! To the next generation of intersteller travelers, look to the coming year as your time to become an adventurer, a scientist, and a dreamer with thoughts so enormous only an infinite universe can contain it all!
But don't keep it to yourself, soon-to-be-astronaut. Write it down! How else would anyone know of your wondrous feats of derring-do? Just ask PAL. His exact words to me were, "I don't want to hear it!" I understood immediately. Obviously, he thought my tales were too amazing for his audio receptors alone.
As Earth continues along a new revolution, we only need to look to the stars to see that our future is not as far off as we think. With a well supplied rocket ship equipped with food, water, oxygen, and tons of books and games, I think the adventures are about to begin. I look forward to it and hope you will join me. Don't forget to write.
Monday, December 19, 2011
How to avert a holiday crisis
With the holidays imminently close, does your face flush and do your hands get clammy when you have no idea what gift to get for folks on your gift list? Hopefully this only happens in this specific instance, otherwise I suggest seeking medical attention. Allow me to impart to you some highly prized gift suggestions for those “never know what to get them” people on your list.
The Self-Assigned Navigator who never asks directions but never gets lost: Been There, Done That set -- a Map of the Known Universe and a set of Solar System cards to send home with tales of rollicking adventure.
The Closeted Astronaut who has yet to admit that space travel is the most awesomest thing ever: Will I Make a Good Space Traveller? poster -- the answer is, “Of Course”, but it doesn’t hurt to be reassured of how stellar you are.
The Chief Engineer-In-Training who would just as soon build their own holiday gifts: the Little Helper -- because who couldn't use an extra set of alligator clips and a magnifying glass? Think about it.
The Star of the Show who never gets a break because everyone wants to talk to them: Cherry-Scented Diversion Deployment System -- sometimes a good defense begins with a pleasant smelling distraction.
The Onboard Computer who argues wikipedia is not a primary source: Comparative Measuring Device -- because truth is relative until it isn’t.
The Celestial Dreamer who has tons of great ideas but can never remember them: Metallic Brain Stimulator -- also good for those who have no intention of feeling like they are in over their heads.
The Star Gazer who looks to the skies and sees themselves exploring the far reaches of the galazy: “Sic Itur Ad Astra” t-shirt -- where “Thus, one will go to the stars” is more a life mission than mere words.
Last but not least, the person who has everything: Certainty -- conveniently contained and ready for use should answers be questioned or the future be predicted.
Of course, you are free to decide which gift is right for the crew of your starship and the Greenwood Space Travel Supply Co. has a great deal more than what I’ve included here. You can also fly by the store and see what you can only obtain once you’re AFK ("away from keyboard", but you already knew that) like terrra forming supplies and games and activities that will help you while away the time in between exploring and discovering. Tell ‘em the captain sent you.
The Self-Assigned Navigator who never asks directions but never gets lost: Been There, Done That set -- a Map of the Known Universe and a set of Solar System cards to send home with tales of rollicking adventure.
The Closeted Astronaut who has yet to admit that space travel is the most awesomest thing ever: Will I Make a Good Space Traveller? poster -- the answer is, “Of Course”, but it doesn’t hurt to be reassured of how stellar you are.
The Chief Engineer-In-Training who would just as soon build their own holiday gifts: the Little Helper -- because who couldn't use an extra set of alligator clips and a magnifying glass? Think about it.
The Star of the Show who never gets a break because everyone wants to talk to them: Cherry-Scented Diversion Deployment System -- sometimes a good defense begins with a pleasant smelling distraction.
The Onboard Computer who argues wikipedia is not a primary source: Comparative Measuring Device -- because truth is relative until it isn’t.
The Celestial Dreamer who has tons of great ideas but can never remember them: Metallic Brain Stimulator -- also good for those who have no intention of feeling like they are in over their heads.
The Star Gazer who looks to the skies and sees themselves exploring the far reaches of the galazy: “Sic Itur Ad Astra” t-shirt -- where “Thus, one will go to the stars” is more a life mission than mere words.
Last but not least, the person who has everything: Certainty -- conveniently contained and ready for use should answers be questioned or the future be predicted.
Of course, you are free to decide which gift is right for the crew of your starship and the Greenwood Space Travel Supply Co. has a great deal more than what I’ve included here. You can also fly by the store and see what you can only obtain once you’re AFK ("away from keyboard", but you already knew that) like terrra forming supplies and games and activities that will help you while away the time in between exploring and discovering. Tell ‘em the captain sent you.
Sunday, December 11, 2011
Order Deadlines for Christmas, 2011
We may rely on relativistic-speed rockets and teleporters for interstellar travel, but we rely on the United States Postal Service for delivery of packages. To assure that your space traveling necessities arrive in time for Christmas, please have your orders in by the following dates:
DOMESTIC
- The Captain
DOMESTIC
- Via Priority Mail – Deadline has passed
- Via Express Mail – Deadline has passed
- Via Cheapest Mail Service – Deadline has passed
- Via Priority Mail Service – Deadline has passed
- Via Express Mail Service (Central and South America, Africa) – Deadline has passed
- Via Express Mail Service (Europe, Australia, Mexico, Middle East) – Deadline has passed
- Via Express Mail Service (Canada) – Deadline has passed
- The Captain
Monday, December 5, 2011
New Website in Time for the Holidays!
Captain’s Log: Stardate 12.05.2011
It’s here! So sleek! So modern! So navigable! It could be lovely enough to rival Saturn’s majestic rings or the atmospheric bands on Jupiter! You don’t know? I suppose with the onset of the holiday season anything that isn’t bedecked, bedazzled, or beglittered can be easily missed. Allow me to explode your mind... We are launching a new website for the Greenwood Space Travel Supply Co.! Whatever your interstellar travel need and wherever you are on Earth (international shipping available!), we can help you gear up for any and all adventures.
Books to pass the time during long-term space travel!
Stylish t-shirts for the fashion conscious cosmonaut!
A Map of the Known Universe because in space, no one can give you directions!
And more things you don’t even know you need!
Being a seasoned space traveller has taught me a thing or five, the most important of which is, “A lack of preparation is a prescription for mishaps.” I don’t like the taste of medicine and “mishaps” sounds disgusting so I make sure I’m fully stocked in “preparation”. You can never have too much “preparation”, fellow travellers, just like you can never be too careful or never inflate too many gaseous containment units.
Check out our new Greenwood Space Travel Supply Co. website and get packing for your next stellar journey!
It’s here! So sleek! So modern! So navigable! It could be lovely enough to rival Saturn’s majestic rings or the atmospheric bands on Jupiter! You don’t know? I suppose with the onset of the holiday season anything that isn’t bedecked, bedazzled, or beglittered can be easily missed. Allow me to explode your mind... We are launching a new website for the Greenwood Space Travel Supply Co.! Whatever your interstellar travel need and wherever you are on Earth (international shipping available!), we can help you gear up for any and all adventures.
Books to pass the time during long-term space travel!
Stylish t-shirts for the fashion conscious cosmonaut!
A Map of the Known Universe because in space, no one can give you directions!
And more things you don’t even know you need!
Being a seasoned space traveller has taught me a thing or five, the most important of which is, “A lack of preparation is a prescription for mishaps.” I don’t like the taste of medicine and “mishaps” sounds disgusting so I make sure I’m fully stocked in “preparation”. You can never have too much “preparation”, fellow travellers, just like you can never be too careful or never inflate too many gaseous containment units.
Check out our new Greenwood Space Travel Supply Co. website and get packing for your next stellar journey!
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